Leaked deadpool script pdf

Let's go, Pondolem. Be careful, Peter. Breakfast or beer? Where's Pondolempolice station? The new one? Here it is. Right in front of us. It was inaugurated just last week. The faded one right next to it is the old police station. Okay, thanks. All the policeofficers have breakfast here. Some of them eat breakfast, lunch and dinnerright here.

I see. Come over, after duty hours. I'll serve you chilled beer and fried fish. Let's see. Excuse me. Who's the Senior PI? Who are you?

I have been transferred here. Sir, do come in. You're welcome. Have a seat. Sir will be here, soon. Isn't that Vijay Salgaonkar? Yes, sir. That's him. He seems to be pretty straight forward. But, appearances can be deceptive, sir. What do you mean?

Vijay, sir. Get him, get him. Hey, hey, hey. That was an awesome chase, sir! They've edited it with fast cuts and taken the audience for a ride. On top of that, the music is pounding away! So that it seems as if a lot is going on. But, nothing is really happening. We've kept tabs on you, Mr. Our records show you're a fighter. And not just on behalf of Uncle Sam, impressive as your service was. Do you want to die here without a whimper? Super-heroes pull down a ton of ass: Defini te pro.

Local drycleaning discounts. Lucrative movie career. On the con side: Super-heroes? Fucking teacher's pets. Also, Russian. No sense of humor whatsoever. You big, chrome cock-bobber! You're really gonna fuck this up for me?! Besides, no one's getting hurt!

Deadpool slowly turns around to LOOK, then turns back. Been a superhero. The day I decide to become a crime-fighting shitswizzler who rooms with 44 other little whiners at the Neverland mansion of some creepy old bald Heavens-Gate-Iooking motherfucker on that day I'll send your shiny, happy ass a friend request.

Either that or slap the bitch outta you. I mean, other people I admire think you're funny, so even though I don't get you, I trust their opinion. The point is, this is going to hurt me more than it hurts you.

Deadpool backs off Colossus and holds up two little limp wrists like an effeminate boxer. I promise. It's suddenly BENT at an entirely. So he starts to HOP.

Now it's headed. And I really wish you would. He bites asphalt, dazed. Deadpool dangles in mid-air by the wrist. Worm briefly locks eyes with Wade, but quickly moves on by. Wade is wheeled into the particular tent that is his new home. WADE My first request? A warmer table. Kane also has robotic prosthetic legs and a bionic EYE. WADE Lose your sense-of-humor the other parts? WADE And you're the brains?

WADE re: match Choad substitute? WADE Fine. But you'll tell me when I'm a super-hero? AJAX O. Sure we will, Wade. AJAX You're a talker. Wade's eyes are suddenly wide. I manage the Workshop. This speech used to be full of euphemisms like 'You may feel some discomfort,' and 'This might hurt a little. AJAX The Workshop is a private institution tasked with turning reclamation projects like yourself into men of extraordinary abilities.

If you think cancer cures painlessly, you're wrong. If you think super-human powers are acquired painlessly, wrong.

Ajax touches Wade's skin with the end of the scalpel, pressing here and there just SHY of hard enough to draw blood. AJAX You've heard the whole make-anomelette, break-some-eggs bit?

I'm about to hurt you, Wade. The kind of hurt I can't describe and you can't prepare for. You're gonna feel it your cells. In your heart. It is. And there's no way out for you. No secret you can tell me to stop. No soft spot in my heart to appeal to. The facts are. You're gonna lie there. And I'm gonna torture you stupid.

One more thing. What's the ad? I'm a client? The Workshop used a microscopic torch to cauterize every nerve ending in my body. Imagine what that was like.

But thanks to the procedure, I no longer feel pain. Shit toothy smile I no longer feel anything. Ajax stares. WADE Got something in your teeth. Then walks. Outside the tent, Ajax hesitates, then can't help but check his teeth in the reflection of a chrome tray. Made you look! Hey, is Ajax your real name? What's it really? Ajax almost turns around, rising to Wade's bait, then thinks better of it. WADE I'll take the pastrami on pumpernickel. Have you gazed out on the ocean? Seen the breaching of a whale?

Have you watched the dolphins frolic in the foam? I want to live, I want to grow. I want to see, I want to know. I want to share what I can give. I want to be I want to live! During the vignettes, Wade keeps gamely asking his tormentors the same question, with disturbingly less strength and energy each time:.

WADE now? WADE distant, meek, in the dark Can you hear me now? The doctor is almost avuncular, protruding belly. WORM Kill me. I can't go on like this. Fuck him up, Worm! How tough can he be? Name like Francis. WADE That's right! He got 'Ajax' off a dish-washing liquid! Legal name's Francis. Ajax's expression tells us all we need to know about the validity of Wade's claim. Snagged it off your lab coat. I may be able to get you a discount. You can't really step it up from there.

I figured, why behave? Whatever Francis does to me can't get any worse. AJAX Is that what you think? WADE Yes. I don't have a name for it.

AJAX The trick is to lower the oxygen concentration in Wade's air to the exact point he feels like he's suffocating. If his brain waves slow, meaning he's about to pass out, we turn up the If his heart rate slows, meaning he's able to catch his breath, we turn it back down.

And then we leave him. My fourth shittiest moment. The Punch Bowl. And if you think I'm losing my shit 'cause I can't breathe. You're only half right. Ajax appears to be looking at Wade. And perfectly visible to him one foot away. You know what they say. Borderline ghetto. IKEA everywhere. No grass.

Red suit. No mask. No right ARM. BLOOD dripping from the stump plop, plop, plop - onto the stoop. Blind Al shakes her head. Stands up in comfy creme nursing shoes. Grabs her red-tipped CANE. Blind Al goes down again. This place reeks like old lady pants.

I'm old. I wear pantsuits. S Bactine? Bactine should do it. Blind Al turns the final screw. The shelves look like the Leaning Tower of Piza in shitty white particle board. Blind to life's imperfections. Must be good with hands. That fucker who turned me into this ass-ugly monster the one I've been waiting five fucking years for slipped through my arm today. Deadpool holds up his stump. A little infant ARM is emerging off it. Meantime, the girl I love - not you - wouldn't fuck me with your dick.

So yeah, things are pretty fucking spectacular. Sits back, beyond. Deadpool stands. In happier times. Wearing Christmas sweaters. He stares at it. I,nOh a. Flames LEAP. Patients FLEE. Totally He. Wade's eyes are lit with fire. Ajax takes his own fire extinguisher to the CHIN. WADE One question. To make sure you're still responsive.

You can't kill me. I'm the only one who can fix that face. WADE Well aware. But first. Let's fix into his. WADE Lemme guess.

You don't feel a thing. WADE I got next. Let's go turn me back to beautiful. Wade carries Ajax down the ward. Wade manages to stand in the debris. He spies Ajax lying nearby. Wade sprints until he spies a hole in the wall. WORM O. He's nearly. Kill me. WORM Please. Wade steps back into the shadows, watching helplessly as his PREY recedes into the distance. Bares its teeth. Hustles him across the street. Never seen Puppetry of the Penis?!

Sparking up a spliff with the Olympic torch. Giving Meredith Baxter Birney a dutch oven. Sweet bucket list. But I'll never finish it.

Or my Lego Millenium Falcon. Cars and pedestrians ZOOM around. Wade kicks. The rat scurries away. The camera descends through the quiet night air toward the wreckage. And a sprawled WADE. When he reaches Wade's neck, Wade blocks the zipper with a finger. Blood at the pierce points.

The mouth and eyes cut out. Weasel gapes at the sight of WADE, who has just walked in. WADE You should see the polar bear. PATCH consider a beard. You've got super-powers, chief. You'll get the best gigs here. All you need is a nickname.

A slogan. WADE Hope you haven't spent that twentyeight-hundred. As Wade says the word, Weasel and Wade stop laughing and look at one another. He stares at the mask a moment. The inside of the mask is RED. The fish gobble it up. GABE Check it out! GABE approaches the front door, irritated. GABE Shaddup!

What, you got into my coke too? Gabe reaches down to pick it up. Just as quickly, it slides back OUT. Gabe falls onto his BACK. Deadpool turns to go, then stops. And another. The cover melts back into the black shit-kickers and blinding white fortress from earlier. The sequence plays out exactly as it did 48 minutes ago, only this time, we stay with AJAX a moment longer. A TAXI - if you've been paying attention, you will recognize it - pulls up to the curb.

Eating Twizzlers infant arm. The fight in the Escalade. The motorcycle chase. The Ajax confrontation. The arm. Wade backs up. Watches the last bit again. Until we're. And just in time, 'cause I'm about to suck down the third shittiest moment of my life.

PATCH stares. Patch still stares. Every head turns, like in. The four walk up to the bar. Weasel slinks away. But everyone ELSE in the bar isn't so petrified. AJAX to do you a favor. Ajax takes in the big dead pool on the wall. The men extend their hands. Around the room, men remove their fingers from triggers. But we are loaded. Are you or are you not the kind of guys who will take a dime to fuck a brother up? Flex and Boothe, at either end of the bar, stand up.

FLEX We're those kind of guys. It thunders through the room. Then, just as quickly as it began, it's OVER. AJAX points to the dead pool Whoever had you lost big. Little fucking weasel. So you get to spread the word: If anyone in our fair city wishes to engage the services of an agent of looks around the bar destruction they talk to me.

Supermercenary work: these ain't the wayward girls of Sister Margaret's. And there ain't no code. Wyre snaps out of his reverie, annoyed. Got a spill on. If I'm sitting in a guy's lap, it usually means I'm working. Deadpool brings the blades down in an 'X,' slicing through the wires and freeing himself. Best case scenario: You tell me where I can find Francis. He cures me. And you live. Best case. Deadpool removes the chair leg from Wyre's teeth. You'll have to kill me first. Ajax and Angel Dust are after Vanessa.

Wade and Weasel head to a strip club to find her before the villains. Ajax kidnaps Vanessa in the alley behind the strip club. Ajax kidnaps Vanessa behind the strip club. Deadpool, Colossus, and NTW storm the fortress at the scrapyard. They battle it out with superpowers. Wade and Vanessa reunite and share a disgusting kiss while listening to Wham!

A callback in the script. This highway bridge scene really sets the tone for the entire movie. In the script, the lines are a bit different. As mentioned in the quotes section above, the writers give alternate lines right inside the script so that the filmmakers have comedic options when the scene is captured. Much of the script was either changed or filmed and then cut later in the edit. It seems obvious from the script that the writers knew Ryan Reynolds would be the star, but perhaps TJ Miller was cast later and of course given an opportunity to add lines and possibly improvise a bit.

Deadpool is perfect case study on how to bring a brand of biting humor along with a distinct meta quality. If you want to read more, we have other great titles, such as The Dark Knight Rises , The Avengers and Joker in our screenplay database.

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